When I was in high school I wanted to be an actress. Retrospectively, what I actually wanted was an excuse to act like a total drama queen and get away with it, but of course I didn't know that at the time. What I did know was that I had a great memory for memorizing lines, I wasn't afraid of being in front of a crowd (or making a total idiot of myself in front of said crowd) and, most importantly, I was loud. I never got direction to speak up, but someone once told me they could hear me outside of the auditorium. I was also dramatic and could cry on cue, but to be fair, the same could be said of most seventeen-year-old girls. Other than that, I wasn't very good. I've heard that part of acting is reacting and I could never remember this once on stage. I mostly just spaced out and waited until it was my turn to say something. Needless to say, it didn't take long after high school to scratch "Award-Winning Actress" off of my list of dreams.
The reason I decided I wanted to be an actress in the first place was because of Saturday Night Live. This is hardly an original statement, especially if you've ever read the biographies of anyone who has ever acted on the show, but it's true. My obsession started in the Tina Fey/Jimmy Fallon/Amy Poehler days and I became convinced that being another hilarious actress on the show was the only job I would ever want.
My second semester of college, I took my first creative writing class and, to make the understatement of the century, it blew my mind. I've always liked to write, but up until that point I thought there had to be a formula for writing (as in: intro, body paragraphs, conclusion and all the other things that are relentlessly crammed down your throat in high school) and the freedom to write whatever I wanted was amazing. Suddenly I saw myself less in the funny girl-AmyPoehler-esque role and saw my dream in a whole new light. Why say funny things when you can write funny things that everyone else says? Frankly, everyone knows the writing is where the real talent is. Have you ever seen a movie that looked really amazing and had Academy Award winning actors in it, but completely sucked? I guarantee you it sucked because the writing was bad. It doesn't matter how good an actor is, that only goes so far when absolute crap is coming out of their mouths. All traces of ever wanting to become an actress were officially gone by that point. I wanted to be a writer. But not just any writer, an SNL writer.
Needless to say, it's been years since this realization and, unfortunately, a bit of a fruitless journey so far. But no matter how much time goes by, I continue to have my SNL daydream, which basically consists of an 80's movie style montage of me, Josh, and the kids frollicking around a really amazing city, doing cool things and hanging out with Andy Samberg, all set to that Jay-Z song about New York (I think it probably goes without saying that I don't have the greatest grasp on reality, but I at least redeem myself by being aware of it...right??). I have had the butterfly-inducing opportunity of meeting a couple of former SNL writers who all say the same thing: It's hard, continuous work where you spend a lot of time writing until 5 AM, the city is very expensive and frolicking intolerant, and it's actually pretty unlikely that I'd hang out with Andy Samberg.
But I don't care. It's still my dream and despite getting older, having kids, having responsibilities that tie me to where I am, or even having opportunities that take me in a different direction, I've never been able to give up on it. I don't want to give up on it. In other words, if I'm the show's first seventy-eight-year-old intern, that will be perfectly fine with me.
And if it never happens...that's okay too. I have a great life and family that I'm unbelievably proud of and even if it means I'll never become the next Tina Fey, I'm still satisfied with it.
But a girl can still dream...
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
The Student Has Become The Master
You don't choose the traits that are passed on to your kids. This wasn't a problem when Layla got Josh's never-ending empathy or when Ben got Josh's easy, light-hearted sense of humor. Unfortunately, since it's pretty much impossible to give birth to two Josh clones, they were genetically destined to aquire a trait or two of mine.
Which is why I'm now I'm the Queen Mother of All That Is Stubborn. Literally.
It all began fairly recently when Ben decided that he hated putting his PJs on. Evidently somewhere along the line he made the connection that PJs equal bedtime, and there's nothing he hates more than having to go to bed. Much like he truly believes that the shower is a porthole to Narnia from which I will never return every time I take a shower, he believes that absolutely nothing cool or fun happens until his head hits the pillow. Of course, anyone with kids knows that this couldn't be farther from the truth because generally the moment the kids go to sleep is the moment that you're finally free to sit on your butt and do absolutely nothing at all. It's glorious, and when your kid's massive stubborn streak turns what should be a short, sweet process into an hour-long battle, it can feel especially frustrating. Especially when that massive stubborn streak is directly inherited from you.
Despite what you've read in this blog, I do actually have a few good qualities. I'm nice. I'm honest. I brake for animals. But my good qualities tend to get pushed into the shadows by my keen ability to have an adult-sized temper tantrum because I flat-out refuse to admit that I accidentally bought a head of cabbage instead of a head of lettuce. I'm a mature adult, just not when it comes to admitting that I'm wrong. Or doing something I don't want to do. Or when I've lost my cell phone for the eighty-seventh time that day. And now, it appears, I've created an adorable little monster.
Layla is stubborn in her own ways, but she's still impressively pliable for a four-year-old. The only thing she really ever fights me to the death on is wanting to wear her tiara to the grocery store. There's no negotiating with Ben. He can't be bribed, bought, coerced, or otherwise distracted from what he wants. If you think you can talk sense into him, you're wasting your time. While I believe that every two-year-old is impervious to logic (especially when it's coming from their parents), Ben doesn't even waste his time pretending to listen. Negotiation attempts are right on par with trying to talk to a kitchen table, but at least the table will sit still while it ignores you. Whether it's bypassing bedtime or getting a cookie after we say no, Ben never forgets and will continue to try and try to get what he wants until you collapse and give in. To be honest, if he was someone else's kid, I'd probably admire his commitment. His pièce de résistance, and subsequent salt in the wound, is that he usually doesn't even want whatever it was that was a seemingly necessary staple in his life mere moments earlier. He just wants to prove that he can get what he wants.
The student has become the master.
Which is why I'm now I'm the Queen Mother of All That Is Stubborn. Literally.
It all began fairly recently when Ben decided that he hated putting his PJs on. Evidently somewhere along the line he made the connection that PJs equal bedtime, and there's nothing he hates more than having to go to bed. Much like he truly believes that the shower is a porthole to Narnia from which I will never return every time I take a shower, he believes that absolutely nothing cool or fun happens until his head hits the pillow. Of course, anyone with kids knows that this couldn't be farther from the truth because generally the moment the kids go to sleep is the moment that you're finally free to sit on your butt and do absolutely nothing at all. It's glorious, and when your kid's massive stubborn streak turns what should be a short, sweet process into an hour-long battle, it can feel especially frustrating. Especially when that massive stubborn streak is directly inherited from you.
Despite what you've read in this blog, I do actually have a few good qualities. I'm nice. I'm honest. I brake for animals. But my good qualities tend to get pushed into the shadows by my keen ability to have an adult-sized temper tantrum because I flat-out refuse to admit that I accidentally bought a head of cabbage instead of a head of lettuce. I'm a mature adult, just not when it comes to admitting that I'm wrong. Or doing something I don't want to do. Or when I've lost my cell phone for the eighty-seventh time that day. And now, it appears, I've created an adorable little monster.
Layla is stubborn in her own ways, but she's still impressively pliable for a four-year-old. The only thing she really ever fights me to the death on is wanting to wear her tiara to the grocery store. There's no negotiating with Ben. He can't be bribed, bought, coerced, or otherwise distracted from what he wants. If you think you can talk sense into him, you're wasting your time. While I believe that every two-year-old is impervious to logic (especially when it's coming from their parents), Ben doesn't even waste his time pretending to listen. Negotiation attempts are right on par with trying to talk to a kitchen table, but at least the table will sit still while it ignores you. Whether it's bypassing bedtime or getting a cookie after we say no, Ben never forgets and will continue to try and try to get what he wants until you collapse and give in. To be honest, if he was someone else's kid, I'd probably admire his commitment. His pièce de résistance, and subsequent salt in the wound, is that he usually doesn't even want whatever it was that was a seemingly necessary staple in his life mere moments earlier. He just wants to prove that he can get what he wants.
The student has become the master.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
In Defense Of Jessica Alba
I have a confession to make. Besides my incredibly talented blogger friends, I almost never read any of the random blogs floating around out there. And yesterday I remembered why.
I stumbled across a blog completely by accident while browsing around one of my new favorite female-empowering websites (though the actual motives of this website, which shall remain nameless, are now seriously being questioned). Rather than put up a link to this garbage and force someone else to read it, I'll paraphrase it.
It was called "Another Person I'm Not Happy For: Jessica Alba" and went on to talk about how awful actress Jessica Alba is because she has two kids and a rockin' body. But what really irritated me was when the "writer" went on to say that she's jealous of the bodies of Victoria's Secret models, but "when they open their mouths to try speaking English it sounds like they’re coming off of a big dose of Anesthesia. None of the vowels work, and the more they talk the better I look next to them".
Okay...really?!
Don't get me wrong. I'm a woman who's had two kids and I'm just as self-conscious about my body as the next woman who has had two kids (or who hasn't had any kids at all, for that matter). But do you know what makes me feel better? Taking my kids outside and chasing them around. You know what doesn't make me feel better? Putting other people down.
As a woman, it's hard. We're trained to be critical of other women practically from birth. It's all one big competition. But the one thing I've learned over the past year is that it doesn't have to be that way. I repeat, It. Doesn't. Have. To. Be. That. Way.
Case in point: Last semester I was in the restroom at school washing my hands when a girl came out of the stall to wash her hands next to me. This girl was a knock-out in that make-up free, glowing skin kind of way that makes those of us who look like the troll that lives under the bridge first thing in the morning practically salivate with envy. To top it off, she was wearing one of those really cool wrap-around dresses in really bright colors that I probably couldn't even figure out how to put on, much less successfully pull off. Under ordinary circumstances, I probably would have done what I have spent the last twenty-seven years of my life doing (assume that because she's pretty, she's a bitch and continue to wash my hands with my head down) but I'd just come up with my book club's mission statement and a theory of my own; All of the "girl hate" with which we become so accustomed, is nothing more than a bad attitude and all in our heads. So instead of ignoring her, I decided to start practicing what I'd just started preaching and I told her I liked her dress (because I did) and I could never pull it off myself (because I couldn't).
She turned around, literally beamed at me and started thanking me profusely. We got to talking and it turns out her boyfriend told her he thought it was an ugly dress right before she walked out the door that morning and she'd been feeling awful all day (Just a side rant: Josh would wear a black polo shirt and jeans seven days a week if he thought he could get away with it. Unless he's gay, never listen to a guy when it comes to what you're wearing. Trust me, it's a waste of time). I refrained from suggesting she should dump her boyfriend and instead reinstated how great the dress was. No, we didn't become best friends (because life isn't a Taylor Swift video) but we talked long enough for me to be ten minutes late to class and whenever I saw her on campus the rest of the semester, we always smiled and waved.
My point is this: We live in an ugly world right now and it sickens me that so many people are not only okay with that, but seem hell-bent on making it uglier. The blog from the site-that-shall-remain-nameless was one of the most unnecessarily hateful things I've ever read. It didn't sound like it was written by an (allegedly) legitimate adult writer, but rather like it was written by a jealous sixth grader on the wall of a middle school bathroom in pink sharpie. I'm not really even a Jessica Alba fan to be honest and if the "writer" had written about how the last few Jessica Alba movies she's seen have been horrible and maybe Jessica Alba should consider a different career, there may have been a small amount of legitimacy to her point. In other words, if you feel the need to criticize, criticize the content, not the package it comes in. We can be better than that...I hope.
I'm far from perfect and I think that changing our attitudes towards each other takes a lot of time and effort. I hope that if you read the blog (which despite my rant, I still wouldn't suggest doing) your first thought isn't "Of course she has a perfect body, she has a nanny and a personal trainer" because a) We really don't know anything about anyone for an absolute fact, and b) Even if I personally had both a nanny and a trainer it wouldn't be enough to make me not want to sit on the couch and eat ice cream while watching The Simpsons every night. That kind of motivation is super-human, no matter who you are or what resources you have. Instead I say, kuddos to Jessica Alba, kuddos to my marathon-running friends, and kuddos to awesome women all over the world, whether you're staying healthy or doing something positive in the world. It's negative blogs like that one that have made me realize that you ladies are few and far between.
Finally, in the words of one of my own personal heroes, the gorgeous Tina Fey, "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. All you can do is solve the problem right in front of you". Amen, sister.
I stumbled across a blog completely by accident while browsing around one of my new favorite female-empowering websites (though the actual motives of this website, which shall remain nameless, are now seriously being questioned). Rather than put up a link to this garbage and force someone else to read it, I'll paraphrase it.
It was called "Another Person I'm Not Happy For: Jessica Alba" and went on to talk about how awful actress Jessica Alba is because she has two kids and a rockin' body. But what really irritated me was when the "writer" went on to say that she's jealous of the bodies of Victoria's Secret models, but "when they open their mouths to try speaking English it sounds like they’re coming off of a big dose of Anesthesia. None of the vowels work, and the more they talk the better I look next to them".
Okay...really?!
Don't get me wrong. I'm a woman who's had two kids and I'm just as self-conscious about my body as the next woman who has had two kids (or who hasn't had any kids at all, for that matter). But do you know what makes me feel better? Taking my kids outside and chasing them around. You know what doesn't make me feel better? Putting other people down.
As a woman, it's hard. We're trained to be critical of other women practically from birth. It's all one big competition. But the one thing I've learned over the past year is that it doesn't have to be that way. I repeat, It. Doesn't. Have. To. Be. That. Way.
Case in point: Last semester I was in the restroom at school washing my hands when a girl came out of the stall to wash her hands next to me. This girl was a knock-out in that make-up free, glowing skin kind of way that makes those of us who look like the troll that lives under the bridge first thing in the morning practically salivate with envy. To top it off, she was wearing one of those really cool wrap-around dresses in really bright colors that I probably couldn't even figure out how to put on, much less successfully pull off. Under ordinary circumstances, I probably would have done what I have spent the last twenty-seven years of my life doing (assume that because she's pretty, she's a bitch and continue to wash my hands with my head down) but I'd just come up with my book club's mission statement and a theory of my own; All of the "girl hate" with which we become so accustomed, is nothing more than a bad attitude and all in our heads. So instead of ignoring her, I decided to start practicing what I'd just started preaching and I told her I liked her dress (because I did) and I could never pull it off myself (because I couldn't).
She turned around, literally beamed at me and started thanking me profusely. We got to talking and it turns out her boyfriend told her he thought it was an ugly dress right before she walked out the door that morning and she'd been feeling awful all day (Just a side rant: Josh would wear a black polo shirt and jeans seven days a week if he thought he could get away with it. Unless he's gay, never listen to a guy when it comes to what you're wearing. Trust me, it's a waste of time). I refrained from suggesting she should dump her boyfriend and instead reinstated how great the dress was. No, we didn't become best friends (because life isn't a Taylor Swift video) but we talked long enough for me to be ten minutes late to class and whenever I saw her on campus the rest of the semester, we always smiled and waved.
My point is this: We live in an ugly world right now and it sickens me that so many people are not only okay with that, but seem hell-bent on making it uglier. The blog from the site-that-shall-remain-nameless was one of the most unnecessarily hateful things I've ever read. It didn't sound like it was written by an (allegedly) legitimate adult writer, but rather like it was written by a jealous sixth grader on the wall of a middle school bathroom in pink sharpie. I'm not really even a Jessica Alba fan to be honest and if the "writer" had written about how the last few Jessica Alba movies she's seen have been horrible and maybe Jessica Alba should consider a different career, there may have been a small amount of legitimacy to her point. In other words, if you feel the need to criticize, criticize the content, not the package it comes in. We can be better than that...I hope.
I'm far from perfect and I think that changing our attitudes towards each other takes a lot of time and effort. I hope that if you read the blog (which despite my rant, I still wouldn't suggest doing) your first thought isn't "Of course she has a perfect body, she has a nanny and a personal trainer" because a) We really don't know anything about anyone for an absolute fact, and b) Even if I personally had both a nanny and a trainer it wouldn't be enough to make me not want to sit on the couch and eat ice cream while watching The Simpsons every night. That kind of motivation is super-human, no matter who you are or what resources you have. Instead I say, kuddos to Jessica Alba, kuddos to my marathon-running friends, and kuddos to awesome women all over the world, whether you're staying healthy or doing something positive in the world. It's negative blogs like that one that have made me realize that you ladies are few and far between.
Finally, in the words of one of my own personal heroes, the gorgeous Tina Fey, "Calling somebody else fat won't make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn't make you any smarter. All you can do is solve the problem right in front of you". Amen, sister.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
The Soundtrack To My 2011
Since around the beginning of December, all of the hipsters have been abuzz with their "best of" lists, especially the ones comprised of the albums and singles of 2011. I love reading through them, mostly because as a self-proclaimed music snob it reaffirms my belief that everyone who works in the music industry is secretly twelve years old (two words: Justin Beiber). Anyway, I figure if they can write a "best of" music list, so can I, but hopefully with a bit of a twist.
For me, 2011 was a year of really high highs and really low lows. Music is my safety blanket and always makes me feel better, or lets me know when it's okay to wallow a little (I strongly believe both things are of equal importance). My list is a bit of a cheater list because not everything I loved this year came out in 2011, but what's the point of having your own blog if you can't bend the rules a little?! So instead, my personal "best of" list is a top ten list of all of the songs I loved in 2011 whether they came out this year or not. Take that, Rolling Stone Magazine!
#1: The Healer: Florence and The Machine "Rabbit Heart (Raise It up)"
If you've had a conversation with me about music anytime over the last two years, it's likely I've cornered you and talked your ear off about Florence and The Machine. I absolutely love Florence's voice and writing style and feel like she figured out a way to set herself apart from all of the other female singers (good or bad) that have come out the last couple of years. But my Florence turning point came right after my dad passed away. Driving home from the funeral, I listened to this song over and over. It was so ridiculously fitting to how I felt in that (horrible) moment of my life that I truly felt like the song was written for me and she was reaching out to me personally (cheesy I know, but true). It was one of those rare "okay to wallow" moments that always wind up making you feel a little better.
#2: The Kid's Choice: Fitz And The Tantrums "Don't Gotta Work It Out". I don't know what it is about this song, but Layla and Ben could be in the worst mood ever and this song would make them laugh and dance. We were all instantly hooked and chances are good that if I made you a mix in 2011, this song was on it. (And just a side note, it takes a really good song to almost ignore the fact that the lead singer is a cheese ball in a pink suit...you know, almost...)
#3: The Popular Girl: Adelle "Rumor Has It". Okay, so I didn't go with the obvious Adele choice ("Rolling In The Deep") but nonetheless, Adele is loved by practically everyone I know from Beiber fans to heavy metal enthusiasts. I don't know how she does it, but she really did manage to get to everyone this year. "Rumor Has It" is my personal favorite off of her 2011 album and reminds me of driving to school at 6 AM for my 7 AM math final and not even feeling mad about it. In other words, Adele is a miracle worker.
#4 The Deep Thinkers: Mumford And Sons "The Cave". Josh and I have had countless conversations about how much we love these guys. It's hard to combine self-loathing and unbridled hopefulness on the same album, much less the same song, but they manage to do it and most importantly, to do it brilliantly. These guys are a ray of sunshine in an increasingly dismal music industry and if you don't already have this album, you're seriously missing out. Also, it's nice to see someone finally making the banjo cool.
#5 The One The Magazines And I Can Agree On: Wilco "Whole Love". I've liked Wilco for a long time and then we watched a documentary about them a few months ago that made me officially fall in love. In a time when it seems like everyone is pumping out generic music to make a quick dollar, the fact that there are still bands around that care about the quality of their music and the people who listen to it is amazingly refreshing. And on a completely different note, if you have a minute to waste on Youtube (you know you do!) check out Wilco's lead singer Jeff Tweedy randomly showing up on the Chicago news and doing the weather. It's priceless.
#6: Music's Finest Collaboration: She and Him "In The Sun". 2011 was, without a doubt, the year of Zooey Deschanel. She was in "New Girl" and about sixteen different movies, ads, commercials and so many other things that it felt like no matter where you looked, she was in your face. And somehow, I'm not sick of her in the slightest. In fact, if anything, the Zooey D. saturation of 2011 made her even more adorable. Also, every promotional She and Him performance I watched this year made me realize that M. Ward (aka Him in She and Him) is just too cool for words.
#7 The Cover Boys: Vampire Weekend "Everywhere" (Fleetwood Mac cover). I have a confession to make. I morph into a fire-breathing-music-snob every time someone does a cover. I feel like this is mostly justified because it's just not natural for Beyonce to cover Kings of Leon, but it happened (seriously, google it) and the fact remains that most covers are the cringe-worthy red-headed-stepchildren of the original song. Maybe it's because Vampire Weekend is one of my favorite bands, rendering me completely biased, or because I was having a Fleetwood Mac kind of year, but I love this cover. Ezra (I can practically hear Josh in my head saying "Don't say 'the lead singer' like you don't know their names!")'s voice is perfect for the song and the boys know how to rock.
#8 The One I liked, But Never Fully Understood Until 2011: Fleetwood Mac "Landslide". I love Fleetwood Mac and I have always thought this was a pretty fantastic song, but something in my head clicked this year and this song finally made perfect sense to me. I suspect it's because I'm getting old, but I'll try to leave it open to interpretation.
#9 The Guilty Pleasure: Cee Lo Green "Forget You". I know, I know, but this song is so unbelievably catchy that I defy you not to shake your booty when it comes on. Just finding the video (which is also awesome) guarantees this song will be stuck in my head for at least a week. I don't watch The Voice and I don't even like Cee Lo very much generally (with the exception of a few Gnarles Barkley songs) but I couldn't bring myself to change the station whenever this song came on the radio.
#10: The Summarizer: The Head and The Heart "Lost In My Mind". I obviously didn't write this song and therefore can't say with total certainty what it's about, but to me it feels like a lesson in trudging through the lowest lows and sailing through the highest highs all while trying your best not to lose sight of hope. Which in a nutshell, perfectly sums up my 2011.
Happy New Year Friends...The best is yet to come...
For me, 2011 was a year of really high highs and really low lows. Music is my safety blanket and always makes me feel better, or lets me know when it's okay to wallow a little (I strongly believe both things are of equal importance). My list is a bit of a cheater list because not everything I loved this year came out in 2011, but what's the point of having your own blog if you can't bend the rules a little?! So instead, my personal "best of" list is a top ten list of all of the songs I loved in 2011 whether they came out this year or not. Take that, Rolling Stone Magazine!
#1: The Healer: Florence and The Machine "Rabbit Heart (Raise It up)"
If you've had a conversation with me about music anytime over the last two years, it's likely I've cornered you and talked your ear off about Florence and The Machine. I absolutely love Florence's voice and writing style and feel like she figured out a way to set herself apart from all of the other female singers (good or bad) that have come out the last couple of years. But my Florence turning point came right after my dad passed away. Driving home from the funeral, I listened to this song over and over. It was so ridiculously fitting to how I felt in that (horrible) moment of my life that I truly felt like the song was written for me and she was reaching out to me personally (cheesy I know, but true). It was one of those rare "okay to wallow" moments that always wind up making you feel a little better.
#2: The Kid's Choice: Fitz And The Tantrums "Don't Gotta Work It Out". I don't know what it is about this song, but Layla and Ben could be in the worst mood ever and this song would make them laugh and dance. We were all instantly hooked and chances are good that if I made you a mix in 2011, this song was on it. (And just a side note, it takes a really good song to almost ignore the fact that the lead singer is a cheese ball in a pink suit...you know, almost...)
#3: The Popular Girl: Adelle "Rumor Has It". Okay, so I didn't go with the obvious Adele choice ("Rolling In The Deep") but nonetheless, Adele is loved by practically everyone I know from Beiber fans to heavy metal enthusiasts. I don't know how she does it, but she really did manage to get to everyone this year. "Rumor Has It" is my personal favorite off of her 2011 album and reminds me of driving to school at 6 AM for my 7 AM math final and not even feeling mad about it. In other words, Adele is a miracle worker.
#4 The Deep Thinkers: Mumford And Sons "The Cave". Josh and I have had countless conversations about how much we love these guys. It's hard to combine self-loathing and unbridled hopefulness on the same album, much less the same song, but they manage to do it and most importantly, to do it brilliantly. These guys are a ray of sunshine in an increasingly dismal music industry and if you don't already have this album, you're seriously missing out. Also, it's nice to see someone finally making the banjo cool.
#5 The One The Magazines And I Can Agree On: Wilco "Whole Love". I've liked Wilco for a long time and then we watched a documentary about them a few months ago that made me officially fall in love. In a time when it seems like everyone is pumping out generic music to make a quick dollar, the fact that there are still bands around that care about the quality of their music and the people who listen to it is amazingly refreshing. And on a completely different note, if you have a minute to waste on Youtube (you know you do!) check out Wilco's lead singer Jeff Tweedy randomly showing up on the Chicago news and doing the weather. It's priceless.
#6: Music's Finest Collaboration: She and Him "In The Sun". 2011 was, without a doubt, the year of Zooey Deschanel. She was in "New Girl" and about sixteen different movies, ads, commercials and so many other things that it felt like no matter where you looked, she was in your face. And somehow, I'm not sick of her in the slightest. In fact, if anything, the Zooey D. saturation of 2011 made her even more adorable. Also, every promotional She and Him performance I watched this year made me realize that M. Ward (aka Him in She and Him) is just too cool for words.
#7 The Cover Boys: Vampire Weekend "Everywhere" (Fleetwood Mac cover). I have a confession to make. I morph into a fire-breathing-music-snob every time someone does a cover. I feel like this is mostly justified because it's just not natural for Beyonce to cover Kings of Leon, but it happened (seriously, google it) and the fact remains that most covers are the cringe-worthy red-headed-stepchildren of the original song. Maybe it's because Vampire Weekend is one of my favorite bands, rendering me completely biased, or because I was having a Fleetwood Mac kind of year, but I love this cover. Ezra (I can practically hear Josh in my head saying "Don't say 'the lead singer' like you don't know their names!")'s voice is perfect for the song and the boys know how to rock.
#8 The One I liked, But Never Fully Understood Until 2011: Fleetwood Mac "Landslide". I love Fleetwood Mac and I have always thought this was a pretty fantastic song, but something in my head clicked this year and this song finally made perfect sense to me. I suspect it's because I'm getting old, but I'll try to leave it open to interpretation.
#9 The Guilty Pleasure: Cee Lo Green "Forget You". I know, I know, but this song is so unbelievably catchy that I defy you not to shake your booty when it comes on. Just finding the video (which is also awesome) guarantees this song will be stuck in my head for at least a week. I don't watch The Voice and I don't even like Cee Lo very much generally (with the exception of a few Gnarles Barkley songs) but I couldn't bring myself to change the station whenever this song came on the radio.
#10: The Summarizer: The Head and The Heart "Lost In My Mind". I obviously didn't write this song and therefore can't say with total certainty what it's about, but to me it feels like a lesson in trudging through the lowest lows and sailing through the highest highs all while trying your best not to lose sight of hope. Which in a nutshell, perfectly sums up my 2011.
Happy New Year Friends...The best is yet to come...
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Twenty Seven Year Awkward Phase
If you've ever realized that the car parked next to you isn't empty as you originally presumed, but in fact full of people that have just spent the last three and a half minutes watching you do the robot to a John Mayer song, then you know exactly what it's like to be me.
If you've ever watched Paul Rudd in "I Love You, Man" (or pretty much another Paul Rudd movie) and cringed at his total all-encompassing awkwardness, how he can't seem to squeak out a coherent sentence much less play it cool, then you can relate to a day in my life.
I'm so embarrassingly awkward. I have a hard time talking to people I don't know well and find myself either completely tongue-tied or talking endlessly about nothing. The awkward thing I'm the most famous for is what Josh refers to as my "fade to black". As in, I'm talking and I realize that: a) I have no idea what I'm talking about, b) that I have been talking entirely too long or c) that the person I'm talking to has absolutely no idea what I'm talking about, so I just sort of mumble something incoherent and stop talking. Just in case you're wondering, this trick never works. People always say "What?" or "I didn't catch that last part" and it takes all of my willpower as an adult not to point over their shoulder and say "What is that?" and run away when they turn to look.
Unfortunately, I'm also physically awkward, which I've always blamed on being tall. I've spent a lifetime not really knowing what to do with my arms and legs and if there's something to trip over, I'll be the first one to do it (even if I'm just tripping over my own feet). Usually, this is where my physical awkwardness and social awkwardness decide to combine forces and I'll say something extra awkward and goofy (like "Whoa, who put my feet there?") to cover up the fact that I tripped. And no, that never works either.
It's a universal truth that everyone in the world goes through an awkward stage. It's also a universal truth that you eventually get over it. But while everyone else seems to have grown out of their awkward stage, me (and Paul Rudd apparently, although I've watched interviews and real-life Paul Rudd is one of the coolest, non-awkward people ever. Jerk.) are stuck in limbo.. Doesn't being an adult automatically make you less awkward? I'm not a skinny thirteen year old with glasses and braces anymore, so why do I still feel like I am? When will it end?!
I wish I was cool and graceful like whatever the female equivalent of Ryan Gosling would be (Olivia Wilde? Emily Blunt?). In the meantime, I'm the person you can always count on for cringe-worthy moments that probably make you glad that you're not me. And if you're a fan of people who do the robot to John Mayer or the running man to Vampire Weekend, then I will never disappoint.
If you've ever watched Paul Rudd in "I Love You, Man" (or pretty much another Paul Rudd movie) and cringed at his total all-encompassing awkwardness, how he can't seem to squeak out a coherent sentence much less play it cool, then you can relate to a day in my life.
I'm so embarrassingly awkward. I have a hard time talking to people I don't know well and find myself either completely tongue-tied or talking endlessly about nothing. The awkward thing I'm the most famous for is what Josh refers to as my "fade to black". As in, I'm talking and I realize that: a) I have no idea what I'm talking about, b) that I have been talking entirely too long or c) that the person I'm talking to has absolutely no idea what I'm talking about, so I just sort of mumble something incoherent and stop talking. Just in case you're wondering, this trick never works. People always say "What?" or "I didn't catch that last part" and it takes all of my willpower as an adult not to point over their shoulder and say "What is that?" and run away when they turn to look.
Unfortunately, I'm also physically awkward, which I've always blamed on being tall. I've spent a lifetime not really knowing what to do with my arms and legs and if there's something to trip over, I'll be the first one to do it (even if I'm just tripping over my own feet). Usually, this is where my physical awkwardness and social awkwardness decide to combine forces and I'll say something extra awkward and goofy (like "Whoa, who put my feet there?") to cover up the fact that I tripped. And no, that never works either.
It's a universal truth that everyone in the world goes through an awkward stage. It's also a universal truth that you eventually get over it. But while everyone else seems to have grown out of their awkward stage, me (and Paul Rudd apparently, although I've watched interviews and real-life Paul Rudd is one of the coolest, non-awkward people ever. Jerk.) are stuck in limbo.. Doesn't being an adult automatically make you less awkward? I'm not a skinny thirteen year old with glasses and braces anymore, so why do I still feel like I am? When will it end?!
I wish I was cool and graceful like whatever the female equivalent of Ryan Gosling would be (Olivia Wilde? Emily Blunt?). In the meantime, I'm the person you can always count on for cringe-worthy moments that probably make you glad that you're not me. And if you're a fan of people who do the robot to John Mayer or the running man to Vampire Weekend, then I will never disappoint.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
You Get What You Give (TOMS Books For Bloggers)
Maybe it's because I'm pushing thirty or because I'm the mother of two children who are becoming increasingly aware of the world around them, but I began to feel like I wasn't doing enough of anything worthwhile with my time. It's what drew to into finding my purpose and in turn what drew me to Blake Mycoskie's book, Start Something That Matters.
By now we have all seen those cute slide-on shoes with TOMS stitched on the back. We know they're simple in design, relatively inexpensive, and somehow always manage to be in style, particularly on college campuses worldwide. Unfortunately, if you're anything like me, that might be just about all that you know. But not for long.
The first thing Start Something That Matters lets you in on is that Toms is not your typical company and wild-haired, board-short-wearing Mycoskie is far from a typical CEO. An acronym for Shoes for Tomorrow (which above all finally solved the mystery as to why a guy named Blake would have a company called Toms), Toms ensures that with every pair of shoes purchased a child in need receives a pair of shoes too. It is instant charity for a generation of people who want to give but usually don’t have the first idea how to go about it. The simplicity of the concept is incredible; one for you, one for me. When you really stop to think about it, it’s amazing that no one thought of it before. What might be more amazing is that Blake Mycoskie doesn’t want to hide his secret to success, but rather he wants to share it in hopes that everyone will be inspired enough to start something of their own that matters. Which brings us to me.
Last summer I decided to start a book club. I realize that this isn’t the world’s most original idea and that on paper a book club might sound boring and old fashioned, but I like to read and frankly I needed some kind of social life in the worst way. To be honest, I tend to join things rather than start them, so even beginning something felt like a huge obstacle. I set up the meetings to be once a month and the first meeting was held in July. Two meetings later and we were up to twenty people. Because of our shared love for books and wine we decided to call ourselves Reading Between The Wines. We are a diverse group of women from all different walks of life, ethnicities, religions and political parties who get along amazingly. That might not sound like that big of a deal, but the thing is, typically women aren’t very kind to each other. The sad reality is that movies like “Mean Girls” are more fact than fiction and all you have to do is turn on any reality TV show to see the image of women as catty backstabbers, who see each other as competition rather than friends. Women have fought long and hard for so many years for equalization and to be seen as being just as intelligent as men, but turn on the TV and it’s hard to find anything other than Kardashians or The Real Housewives of Wherever displaying not much more than woman-on-woman hate. And yet, once a month I sit in a room full of women who could have easily let their differences get between them but instead chose to focus on what they have in common, in our case a love of great books and great wine. It gives me hope that together we can change the grotesquely inaccurate stereotype of women and bring the importance of intelligence and friendship to the forefront.
I don’t have a product to sell or give away (at least not right now), it’s attitudes and prejudices that I want to change. We have big plans for the coming year, including a book drive in January with all books to be donated to the library at the Women’s correctional facility, because women should be kind to each other no matter what their situation in life is. In addition to our New Mexico branch, we have expanded to Georgia, Ohio, Iowa, and Oregon with hopes of more branches in the future. It’s still pretty fresh, but I already owe much of my inspiration (as well as figuring out the practicalities of a non-profit) to Start Something That Matters.
Start Something That Matters is enlightening and informative, and my only complaint is that it has a tendency to drag at times. Mycoskie recounts the start-ups that inspired him and cites quotes and passages in a way that can often read a lot like a college term paper. If you’re expecting a biography of a man, Mycoskie is quick to let you know that this is the story behind the company, not the story behind the story. In fact, very little of his personal life is revealed at all, aside from an occasional short, well-placed anecdote.
Whether you want to start a for-profit business like Toms or change the world in whatever way you choose, Start Something That Matters is worth a read. Mycoskie offers up so much information, advice, and even free sites to get you started that literally all that’s missing from the book is his hand reaching out to physically shove you in the right direction. This isn’t taking business advice from Donald Trump or any of the hundreds of questionable CEOs of questionable companies, this is taking advice from someone who is truly practicing what they preach (so much so that he recently trimmed down the unnecessary excess in his own life and now lives in a two hundred square foot sailboat. Can you picture Donald Trump living on a tiny boat? Yeah, me neither). Start Something That Matters is equal parts refreshing and inspiring and will undoubtedly leave all aspiring entrepreneurs shaking in their Toms.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Thank You
I don't know about you guys, but sometimes I get so caught up in all of the day-to-day madness that I turn into a giant ball of stress and forget that I have a lot to be thankful for in my life. Since it's Thanksgiving, the national day of stuffing your face and remembering what you're grateful for, I thought I'd share a bit of what I'm grateful for with all of you.
First and foremost, I'm grateful that I married such a great guy who is willing to put up with me, because ten out of ten ex-boyfriends will all agree that I'm a giant pain in the butt. Someone loving you for exactly who you are with no exceptions is something no one should ever take for granted, even though I know I sometimes do. I like to think that if Josh and I were a celebrity couple, we'd be Marge and Homer Simpson. It's not always perfect. We get annoyed with each other sometimes, but at the end of the day (whether that day was good or bad) we're still a team. And, like Homer, Josh can always get out of trouble by making me laugh. He's the guy I've loved for a decade plus one, and it doesn't get much better than that, kids.
I don't know if there will ever be words to properly describe how incredibly thankful I am for Ben and Layla. They are the reason why I work hard, strive for more, and try to be the best possible version of myself. They've taught me a lot so far, the most important being how to love completely unconditionally. It will be a long time before I can sleep in, travel lightly, be spontaneous, go to the movies to see something other than a cartoon, or sit on the couch without being climbed on, and I am one hundred percent okay with that. I'm thankful that I'm lucky enough to spend every day with them, watching them grow in every way possible. My only complaint is that they are both growing up way too fast.
I'm thankful this year to have such an amazing family and family-in-law. I lost my dad this year, but I gained a little brother and a sweet little nephew. I had a lot of ups and downs this year but I always felt like I had my families to help me through. Thank you for all of the support. I love you guys!
Happy Thanksgiving.
First and foremost, I'm grateful that I married such a great guy who is willing to put up with me, because ten out of ten ex-boyfriends will all agree that I'm a giant pain in the butt. Someone loving you for exactly who you are with no exceptions is something no one should ever take for granted, even though I know I sometimes do. I like to think that if Josh and I were a celebrity couple, we'd be Marge and Homer Simpson. It's not always perfect. We get annoyed with each other sometimes, but at the end of the day (whether that day was good or bad) we're still a team. And, like Homer, Josh can always get out of trouble by making me laugh. He's the guy I've loved for a decade plus one, and it doesn't get much better than that, kids.
I don't know if there will ever be words to properly describe how incredibly thankful I am for Ben and Layla. They are the reason why I work hard, strive for more, and try to be the best possible version of myself. They've taught me a lot so far, the most important being how to love completely unconditionally. It will be a long time before I can sleep in, travel lightly, be spontaneous, go to the movies to see something other than a cartoon, or sit on the couch without being climbed on, and I am one hundred percent okay with that. I'm thankful that I'm lucky enough to spend every day with them, watching them grow in every way possible. My only complaint is that they are both growing up way too fast.
Last, but certainly not least, I'm thankful for all of the great friends I've made and all of the old friends I've reconnected with this year. I went from being isolated on Mom Island to having a really amazing group of friends. I've spent a lot of my life feeling like I was more of a guy's girl than a girl's girl and I really feel like I'm appreciating women's friendship for the first time in my life. I'm also thankful for the book club (and all of its wonderful potential) for providing me with a cause to strive for and further direction in my life. I love the unwavering enthusiasm of all of the members and how quick they are to not only support the cause, but to make sure we all have more fun than any book club before. You rock, ladies!!
Husband, kids, family, friends...I may not have the most creative list of things to be thankful for, but I'm incredibly thankful nonetheless. This has been a year of love, friendship, and opportunity, and in many ways it's also been a year of struggle and loss. But good or bad, I wouldn't trade my life for anything in the world.
Happy Thanksgiving.
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